Saturday, May 30, 2009

Happy Anniversary

Tomorrow is our anniversary...six years. It went by so fast. I guess it's true what they say that time flies when you're having fun. Maybe six years doesn't seem like such a long time, but I was married before for 13 years, so all in all, I have been a married woman for a long time. A total of 19 years of married life. Two very different married lives. All of a sudden I feel very blessed. Tonight we're going out to dinner to celebrate. PF Chang' choice. Great food! But now I 'd better go out and buy hubby a nice little card and a present.

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Wake Up

I know I have been one..., a teenager, but I can't remember acting the way teenagers do nowadays. They screw up and they get mad at you or someone else. It's never their fault; the list of excuses go on and on. My daughter tells me she wants to get her driver's permit before going to Sweden on June 14th. Legally, she can't obtain a permit until June 5th (6 months before turning 16). And before she can get a permit she has to complete online driver's ed, pass the DMV test, and be signed up with a certified driving school. So, she is taking the online driver's ed classes, but ever so slowly. There were a total of 22 sections, and I believe she has completed 13.
If it was me, I would have completed the darn thing in a weekend. She is dragging it out, and when I ask her how the hell she thinks she is going to complete everything before Sweden, she has all these dumb excuses. I said, "Listen, the last test will be cummulative and so will the DMV test. If you take too long, you will have forgotten what you learned in the first sections, and you won't pass." She wants to drive so bad, but she doesn't want to do the work. When I remind her that she is the only one that can make it happen, and it is all in her hands, she gets irritable, and I dont understand how much she has to do. Hello..., you barely do your homework, you fake cleaning your room, you spend hours on the phone and the computer everyday. Don't have time...yeah right! You ain't driving my car unless you know the rules of the road and mine.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009


Last night I walked in to my 15 year old daughter's room to look for the house phone. She wasn't home, so I didn't knock. It was a pigsty in there. Half of her clothes were on the floor, under the bed, and on top of chairs. There were probably 4 drinking glasses in there, each with a science experiment in the bottom. Then on top of that there were probably 5 bath towels in there, all on the floor...and of course damp. How can anybody live like that? I worked all weekend and didn't check up on her, but I did tell her to clean her room. I distinctively remember that. I am going to wring her little neck...beause I do have a rule. If I am to pay you an allowance you keep your room clean, and you do our own laundry. But, like an idiot, I paid the allowance without checking. Well, shame on me, but if she thinks I will let her get her driver's permit she better clean up her act.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Busy Weekend

On Friday I took Hayden to the beach again. I also brought his 20 year old sister. Thought they needed to spend some quality time together. Sissy is so busy with school, work and life that we don't see her much. I kind of guilted her into coming, but I think she had a good time. I know Hayden did. He loves to hang with his older siblings. In the evening we actually had everyone home for dinner which was unusual, but very nice.
The rest of the weekend feels like a blur. I worked two back to back 12 hour shifts in the ICU, so I didn't get to see Hayden much. He basically went to sleep by the time I came home. I hate that. I know I should go to bed when he does, but of course I had to pour myself a glass of wine and relax. Then I get stuck in front of the TV and go to bed too late hoping that tonight Hayden will sleep through. He hardly ever does....and didn't this time either. So, I got by with 5 hours of sleep each night since I had to go to work. When will I ever learn?

Friday, May 22, 2009

Date night

We went to the movies last night. We saw "Angels and Demons".....great movie. Our 16 year old took us while the 15 year old stayed home with Hayden!!! The 16 year old works at the movie theater and is allowed to bring two guests for free on weekdays. She has been asking us for quite awhile "Don't you guys want to see a movie?", "I'll get you in for free!" Great perks having teenagers when you have a toddler. Not only do we have built in babysitters, but now we also have a "date night" coordinator. And best of all...our date didn't cost a penny.
As we are sitting in our seats, waiting for the movie to start, we're talking about when was the last time we saw a movie in a theater. We looked at eachother, and I said, "I think it was summer of 2007.", "I was 7 months pregnant with Hayden, and we saw Oceans Thirteen."
Our 16 year old stared at us in disbelief, "You guys are pathetic".

Thursday, May 21, 2009

Going to the Beach

We're going to the beach today...Hayden and I and some friends. I have so much stuff to bring; a cooler with food and drinks, a beach umbrella, a blanket, towels, sunscreen, and of course sandtoys, and change of clothing and extra diapers for Hayden. Gone are the days when I grabbed a bottle of water and threw a towel in the car and said "beach, here I come"'

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

My Little Gentle "Giant"

Took Hayden to "My Gym" this morning. We go every Wednesday for an hour. He had so much fun. It's hilarious watching him tumble and try out new things. He is not as coordinated as some of the little girls; they are like little monkeys, but he is having fun. I guess Hayden is more like a gorilla in comparison. Not as graceful if you know what I mean.
Hayden is a big boy, only 19 months, but he weighs 33 lbs (that's 15 kg, for you my Swedish friends). He is not fat, just big and tall. He looks like a 2 1/2 year old. The little girls in the class are peanuts weighing 5-10 lbs less. That makes a difference if you're going to hold yourself up on the monkey bars.
Hayden is the gentle giant, so sweet and goodnatured, and a total pushover. The other kids can snatch something from his hands and he will just look at them in disbelief, but then find something else to do. But Hayden is smart; he can count to 5 in English and to 10 in Swedish. He recognizes about 20 of the letters of the alphabet in random order. And no, we have not been pushing academics down his throat. He has these foam letters for the bathtub, and he loves to hold them up and ask, "What's this?" So, I answer...and he picked it a little sponge.

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Thoughts to ponder

My 18 year old son went to his first prom this past weekend. He is a senior, so it was now or never. He has a girlfriend now, and did they look good together? My son in a tux, and the girlfriend in a gorgeous dress....aww...young love. They looked stunning together.
My son is graduating from highschool in less than a month! Where did the time go? All of a sudden I feel old. But, I have a toddler in diapers. Does that reverse the time?
Just wondering...

Monday, May 18, 2009

Busy weekend

Hubby came home from Hawaii on Saturday morning...yeah! He had taken the red eye from Honolulu the night before poor thing. He is so sweet. He brought presents for everyone. And I like presents...He got me a pair of True Religion jeans. Did I mention he is good at picking out things for me? He brought shirts for the girls and Hayden, so everyone was happy.
I knew hubby was tired and needed to sleep, so I had planned to go help a friend paint her living room while Hayden and daddy napped. At 10 am Hayden was yawning, so I put him down, and told hubby to go to sleep, and then I left. Three hours later I came back and they were both up( my husband looking very tired). Hayden never went to sleep!!! Did I feel bad?
So, I took Hayden with me to go grocery shopping, and of course he fell asleep in the car ride over there, and actually so did I...Has anyone ever fallen asleep at a traffic light? Very strange feeling. I was in a long line of cars when the light turned red, and before I knew it I was the first in line to go and the light was green and the car behind me was honking. I actually fell asleep at the wheel for a few seconds. See what sleep deprivation can do to you...or maybe I am trying to do too many things in one weekend. My God, that was pretty crazy.
The next morning the hospital called and woke me up at 5:45 to ask if I wanted to work a 12 hour shift in ICU. Did I feel slightly homocidal?
Needless to say I didn't go in to work. Instead hubby and I took Hayden to the Santa Barbara zoo to spend some much needed family time together. Hayden had a blast, and so did we!

Friday, May 15, 2009

Water play

Yesterday was college planning day, and today we're in toddler mode. Woke up to a beautiful morning, and Hayden wanted to play outside. What can I say, living in southern California is great. I just have to open the back door, and Hayden can run out to play dressed only in a diaper. We had a busy morning; we filled his sand and water table, and we filled his old baby bathtub with water. And then we splashed and splashed until the water was gone. But, we weren't ready to quit just yet. So, we filled it again and again. Yes, I did spray him with SP factor 50, before allowing his little naked butt to run free.
We do have a real pool, and it's fenced in for Hayden's sake. It hasn't really been broken in for the summer yet, but it's sparkling clean since I scrubbed it yesterday and adjusted the chemicals. Hayden really wanted to try it out too. So, we sat on the stairs into the pool and splashed some more. The water actually felt pretty good. Not too cold. So, this weekend I think we'll get in for real. Welcome summer!

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Graduating highschool

Went over to my ex husband's to discuss college plans for my graduating senior. He has applied to and been admitted to UCSB. It's not a good time taking funds out from his college fund considering it has dropped approximately 40%, so we are talking about additional ways to finance his education. One idea that came up was for my son to take a low interest student loan. He wasn't to happy about that idea. We also talked about him working part time to help cut the costs. He wasn't too keen on that idea either, but is going along with it. The key wording here is "going along with it". What the hell happened with this generation? Or is it just here in California? I am from Sweden, and I can't recall anybody ever offering to pay for my college education. I don't think I know anybody in Sweden who had their education paid for by their parents. In Sweden kids rely on student loans and grants in addition to working part or full time. At least back when I used to live there.....I know, it's been awhile, and things may have changed. But it's this sense of entitlement that really gets to me. It's going to cost us approximately $23,000 a year for tuition, room, and board. Is it just me or isn't that a bit crazy? And it's not like he is the only one. We have three more after him. Well, the last one will give us a few years before we have to stress over college costs, but the other two are just round the corner from graduating high school. So, I think it's just fair that my son takes some responsibility for his own education and help pay for some of the expenses. There are parents out there who will second mortgage their house and work two jobs to put their kids through school. I told my son I will help him to the best of my ability, nothing more and nothing less. Any thoughts anyone...???

Single parent week

Two more days until hubby comes home...can't wait. Did I mention he is in Hawaii for a convention. Not that I can't handle being alone, actually sometimes it's kind of nice, but its hard being a single parent. This week I have had to do all the cooking, driving to school, getting up at night with Hayden, watering outside plants, scrubbing the pool and checking pool chemicals, and of course parenting two teenagers and a toddler. It makes me really appreciate what I have. My husband mostly work out of the house, so we can share a lot of the responsibilities.
But, I am the softie so when he is gone I get over run with requests. "Can we get take out for dinner?", "Can I have a sleep over?", "Can you take me to my friend's house?", "Can I...?", "Can I...?", "Can I...?" My ears are falling off...did I mention Hayden is the easy one.
In addition to being mom, chauffeur, short order cook, maid, therapist, and "the pool guy" I also have a "real job". I am an RN in a community hospital ICU. Not that I am working that much at the moment, only a weekend or two a month. But every little bit helps. It pays for the groceries, and I keep my foot in the door. I've made the decision to stay home with Hayden as long as possible since neither of us are great fans of daycare. . No offense anyone...

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Diaper duty

  • I was just about to turn off the lights and go to sleep when it dawned on me that I should probably check on baby Hayden, or more like it check his diaper. He has been soaking through the diaper, his clothes and the bed for the past several days. And not only at night, mind you. I have washed his bedlinens and clothes every morning and after every nap for about a week. I was tearing my hair out thinking his still so little I can't restrict his fluid intake. What the heck's going on? Well, finally the lightbulb turned on. In his sleep, he puts his hands down his pants, literally, and stretches the diaper out. So, when the urge is there his "little thing" is pointing straight up and there is no diaper in the world that's going to hold the urine in. So, I made a plan to change his diaper before I go to sleep (while he is still sleeping), and also to use a snapcrotch typ of pajama so that he can't grab hold of his penis. So far it has helped some. It'll keep him dry longer, but I still have to change the sheets in the morning because somehow he still gets the diaper crooked and it leaks. And don't tell me to buy the night diapers...I have already tried. My next plan is to buy depends and ductape.

Tech support needed

I am laying in bed contemplating my day. I have come to the realization that I am technically challenged. Today I spent hours trying to figure out how to transfer videos from my cellphone to my computer. I first tried to send as message, but the attachment was too large. I then thought, aha, that's what the USB cord is for. It didn't work either, so I decide to go online to Tmobile's website and see if I can somehow manage my album online. Well, no such luck, I can't even get to my online album because they were redesigning their website. So, I call their techsupport line and was told that the reason I can't transfer the files is because I needed to download something called samsung pc studio..gaaaawwww. So, I spend the next hour trying to download the darn thing, but it fails. Finally at the end of the day I have the software downloaded, but when I plug in the USB cord it still says "not connected". I gave up because I was about to toss the laptop out the window in to the pool, and that would not have been good. Specially since I always tell my 15 year old who has a short fuse not to take her anger out on inanimate objects.

The joys of older siblings

When my first two were toddlers they never watched tv, but then, they didn't have any teenage siblings. My girls come home from school and they want to "relax" with some stupid reality show and Hayden wants to join them!!!
This morning, driving my 15 year old to school, she says: "Hayden, do the gangster sign!"
Whereas my little munchkin immediately held out his fingers in a crocked sideway V sign with his sister approvingly says "Wassup dog?".

Shrinking family

It's weird how our lage family seems small all of a sudden. My oldest bonusdaughter who is 20 now lives with a friend. She goes to college, works, and is totally independent...(well, most of the time). My 18 year old son lives mostly at his dads because over there he has his own private little guesthouse in the backyard, and his girlfriend lives around the corner. He is graduating from highschool in a month and going off to college in the fall. And this week my husband is out of town, so there's only my two teenage girls, the 19 month old, and me at home. The girls are picky eaters and the toddler, well, he doesn't eat much....My grocery bill has definetily shrunk!

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Early Birds

I was awakened by a twittering sound at 6 am. It was my 19 month old who was parroting the birds outside. I walk in to his room an he is jumping up and down in his crib excited to start the day. Not like his mama who is dragging her feet. Did I mention he actually slept in since he usually wakes up at 5:30...

Monday, May 11, 2009

Lunch time

If you're smart, don't give your 19 month old a youghurt and a spoon and then turn your back. I was getting something out of the fridge, and when I turned around Hayden was holding the cup upside down, watching the yoghurt dripping out of the container and with the other hand happily "painting" the table with the pink "goey" liquid. Did I mention I had just finished cleaning the house?

A summary of me

I'm originally from Sweden, but have lived in California for 19 years. I'm married for the second time, and together we have five children. His, mine, and ours. My two beautiful bonusdaughters are 16 and 20, then I have a beautiful 15 year old daughter, a handsome eighteen year old son, and together we have Hayden 19 months. He's our little miracle baby, our pride and joy, and constant source of fatigue. When you're past 40 (acually 44), somehow our bodies don't adjust as well to the sleepless nights. I am still waiting for him to sleep through.... Our friends, who also have teenagers, probably thought we were crazy for starting all over. We were all dealing with teenage driving, curfews, "boyfriends", and college planning when all of a sudden we found ourself back in diaper mode. It's been different, but a blessing. My days are now filled with walks in the park, rediscovering nature's creatures, mommy and me classes, and discussing colleges with my teens. It's a challenge at times, but also hilarious trying to balance the gearshifting between toddler and teens. The three oldest are all driving, and my youngest teen is taking her online driver's ed. Phew...We survived the first three, so we are pros now, but I am thankful to having a few years until the last one gets ready for driving and SATs. I wanted to share my experience with others and hopefully get feedback from others having made similar choices.....